In yet another of my series of "things I've read that made me say oof....ouch..." was this fabulous tidbit this week on enough.
It captured the essence so perfectly of what I'm struggling with right now professionally. I know that I'm doing some very particular things that I've got the right set of gifts and talents for. I know that I'm filling some needs that would be unlikely to be filled by others in the same way (and I'm saying that as a positive about me). I know that I'm doing some very good, very meaningful things.
I also know that it has been draining, almost to the point of being debilitating. I have had to progressively reclaim my priorities, including things that I generally think of as basic (working out and practicing yoga, for example). I have not cooked a proper meal for myself in 6 weeks, and those who know me well know that means that my life is out of control.
In summary, while I do find satisfaction and meaning in what I'm doing, and while I recognize that not everyone could do it (much less do it well), I am not being nurtured. No, I don't think life is all about taking care of me- that should be implicit in how my life is lived, writ large- but there's more than living in a way that shows integrity and passion. If it's all about the integrity and passion, at some point you (I) end up broken and crabby. And what good is it, really, to nurture everyone else if I'm not doing that for myself as well? I definitely deserve it as much as they do.
I've got that list of things I need more of in my life. I've been making a good-faith effort in November to include one of those things in every day, acknowledging that Kita-walks don't count since they are a constant. And while I've been able to wedge them in, there are definitely some things bigger than the list I want to find space for. That's where the "less" comes in....what has to go so I can have more of the good stuff?
And that is what I need to spend some time pondering.
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Now playing: Grace Potter and the Nocturnals - Ain't No Time
via FoxyTunes